Evan, it seems like every time we get in an argument, my spouse brings up the past, how do we move past this once and for all?

The simple truth is, your spouse does not feel Seen, Heard or Recognized. Once they feel validated they won’t bring it up anymore. Before you tell me you have already apologized, multiple times, I believe you. Please understand, it’s not what you do, it’s how you do it!  If you didn't give a restorative apology, then it's the same as not apologizing at all.  The sad thing is, 99% of us were never taught how to give a restorative apology.

If you were like me, you came from a normal dysfunctional family, restorative apologies were not modeled with my Mom & Dad and their multiple divorces. Even if you were one of the rare few who came from a functional loving home, most couples never discover the most critical tools in communication.

The good news is, you don't need a marriage therapist or a counselor, a restorative apology is simple and easy. My bride and I wi...